A secret relationship success weapon that most people don’t know about is advocating for yourself. Oftentimes, when we’re in a relationship, we care so much about the other person that we forget about our own welfare.

However, relationships should be a two-way street where the needs and wants of each partner can be expressed and acknowledged. When self-advocacy is established, it supports long-term relationship success.

What is self-advocacy?

According to  SelfAdvocateNet, “self-advocacy is our capacity to speak up for ourselves and the things we consider as significant.” It also means that you can express your thoughts and feelings without hesitation.

Additionally, being an advocate for yourself is about making the right decisions regarding things that have an impact on your life. It doesn’t mean that you’re not allowed to get help when troubles arise, but it signifies that you’re 100% responsible for the life choices you make.

How to advocate for yourself

If you’re in a relationship and yet you feel like your needs and wants are not met, you need to consider whether you’re advocating for yourself enough. One of the common signs that you need to advocate for yourself more is when people aren’t respecting your boundaries and don’t care about how you feel.

Here are ways to advocate for yourself more:

●    Figure out what you really want

In order for you to become your own self-advocate, you have to be clear on what you really want and need. Figure out what you need to do to get this and how it makes you feel upon achieving it. This requires introspection and exploring the things that are making you feel happy and secure.

●    Develop self-confidence

Believing that your thoughts and emotions are valid is a good way to develop self-advocacy. It’s not just your partner’s needs that matter but your needs should also be acknowledged. Identify areas in your relationships that affect your confidence and work on them. Try not to engage in negative, self-destructive thoughts too much as this also impacts the way you engage in the relationship.

●    Be assertive

Let your partner know your needs and wants. Don’t let your partner decide everything and make sure you have honest and open communication regarding your relationship needs.

Challenge to become a self-advocate

Take note of the things that you want to pursue – what you really want in life. Think about how you can achieve them and the impact this will have on your relationship. Doing so allows you to acknowledge your emotions, hear yourself and become your authentic self.

Once you know who you really are, you become your own personal advocate who brings your whole self to the relationship. This attracts and maintains long-term relationship success.

Conclusion

Self-advocacy is a skill that you need to develop whether you are in a relationship yet or not. This will help you feel empowered that you’re capable of making the right decisions in a relationship, supporting long-term relationship success.

Watch the video here.

If you want to learn more about relationships, join the Facebook group Long-Term Relationship Success.